That Floating Poo Was Way Too Symbolic! These Are the TV Disappointments of the Past Year.

As we reflect on the television offerings of the recent year, a selection of shows emerge not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from awkward sequels to confusingly poor docuseries, here are the productions that left us utterly bewildered or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Burdened with dreadful scripts, cringe-inducing arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show fought to justify its existence. Briefly, as the third season started, it looked like it had finally hit its stride. Then came an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator announced this would be the final series. It ended on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s toilet full of poo was just way too symbolic. Yet, fans certainly had a hoot dissecting every single “what on earth?” episode. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a small sob?

All’s Fair

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? The answer is a resounding no.’

But that was almost the least of this drama's issues. The recipient of a exceedingly uncommon zero star assessment, it was hard to know where to start listing the flaws. The hilariously wooden writing? The tedious glorification of affluence and consumption? The almost wilful parade of tropes? Performances so bad they felt almost spiteful? Let’s just say “all of the above” and forget about this show again. Except, a second season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Given the legal troubles, domestic violence allegations and fatherly shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d really have gleaned it from this three-part docuseries which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive excess while struggling to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any pity this series might evoke should be saved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charismatic but dismissive egotist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we knew it was preposterous from the outset: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of pure love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.

MobLand

Dodgy characters meeting in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

Actually, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many look a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to indulge unconvincing dialects. But there were plenty of other problems. Primarily that it was just really boring; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various cockney picaresques which felt a bit basic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Given the degree to which she provokes the ire of certain ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s temptingly easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into twee lifestyle as intentional provocations. But then you watch them and are compelled to concede that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine come to life; a poster for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark platitudes and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All supported by vast, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are clearly interesting things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, identity, self-acceptance. But for some reason, this documentary series opted not to say them. Instead, the viewing was akin to consuming a sales catalogue. She obviously has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Game Show

It should have been the next big hit – except even camper, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality overseeing her estate. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too confusing to detail what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The series ended up smelling of a production that was straining desperately to live up to something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you follow a show that captured a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity friends involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of gifted emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A particular sketch was a single joke milked to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar irate mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The material needed to be treated with care. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lumbering from oddly jaunty, slightly mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Perhaps. A total mess? Very much so.

The Maths Genius Thriller

We admire the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the greatest maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a discovery that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about government agencies spying on – and killing off – intellectuals frankly got more farcical by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This hagiography followed the content creator notorious for explicit exploits as she undertook her most extreme feat yet. What on earth would possess her? What we craved was far greater interrogation of her actual psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who showed up to haul her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and zero interrogation of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.